Day Eighteen

Chef was on vacation, so The Chef, who is the school’s program director, advanced instructor and an Iron Chef champ (he beat Cat Cora) filled in. Holy smokes. We’ve got it coming.

He and the Head of Everything are perfect compliments. The Head of Everything is reserved, stoic, large and in charge, while The Chef is fast paced, witty and defines Napoleon Complex. Like the Head of Everything, there is something charming about this little, French man.

“Ohkay, shood we start, yah? Lehtz go My Coreneeshun! Seet down, get reahdhee ahnd we go!” His lecture was quick and full of important, practical information. “Eeef I hav all deez potaytoe peelz in a restrhant, I tell the deeshwashur to fry dem, add a leetle salt and we suurv at dee bar no sharge. Zee custoemhur think zhey geet something for frhee - huh huh huh! But reehly we jhust geeve them salty food and zee bar zales increase twentee purscent!”

We exited lecture, happy with the advanced instruction we will soon receive (about eight weeks from now). We were eager to get into the kitchen and show The Chef our stuff. Turns out, we’ve got no stuff.

“Whut the el are you duing?”
“Who taut you to old a nife dis way?”
“Did I do dis in lectur? No! Do it aghan.”
“Enjhoy your claases now yah? You ahre in cluhb med compahaired to my claas!”

His crowning moment of craziness occurred about one half hour prior to lunch service. One station, not mine (thank god) was hoarding dirty pots and pans all over their counter because they simply didn’t have time to get over to the dishwasher. “What the el? (His favorite question) What is dis? I tell you what it is….a disastur!” He walked over to the counter, stuck out his arm, and swiped the counter clean as though the dirty dishes, utensils and prepared food were droplets on a windshield. The kitchen turned silent. He continued, “Ohkay My Corneeshun we surve in twentee fhive minute! Lets go!” as though nothing had just happened.

Thank god for Mama. One of my favorite gals got flustered upon learning she needed re-make her éclair batter, for a third time. Mama and I were standing next to her when she started to….tear up. Mama put her hand on her shoulder, “No sad. I help you do again. If you work in rehrant and hav sad, you alway go to batroom. Never sad in fron of chef. You unerstand?”

Eclairs

Ingredients
Pastry Crème (see Day
1 c. Milk
4 oz. Butter, cut into small pieces
7 oz. All Purpose Flour
1 tsp. Salt
4-5 eggs

Heat the butter and milk together over a medium heat. Stir occasionally to ensure milk does not burn. When the milk and butter mixture just comes to a boil, quickly dump all the flour and salt into the pot at one time. Immediately begin stirring the mixture with a wooden spoon over the heat. Stir until the mixture comes together to form a dough, called Panade. Do not let it burn by stirring constantly for about 1-2 minutes.

Put the dough into a mixer fitted with a paddle attachment. Turn the mixer on and off every 30 seconds to cool the dough. Once somewhat cool, begin adding the eggs, one at a time. Do not add another egg until the previous egg is fully incorporated. Enough eggs have been added when the batter forms very soft peaks (4 ½ eggs usually does the trick, however it depends how long you dry out the Panade over the heat).

Fill a piping bag (or large freezer bag) with the batter and pipe into éclair shapes on a parchment lined sheet try. Apply egg wash. Bake at 375 degrees for 20 minutes or until puffy and golden brown. Turn down the oven to 325 degrees and continue to bake to dry out the center of the éclairs (about 8 minutes).

When cool, put two holes in the bottom of the éclairs, one to use for filling and the other to allow air to release as pastry cream fills the cavity. Pipe pastry cream into the éclair. Top with powdered sugar (we haven’t learned chocolate fondant icing yet, sorry!)